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Guest Napper #94 – Cuddly Companion

23 May

There’s a lot of buzz out there right now on Facebook and Twitter, with moms discussing the imminent end of school and the looming summer break.

(insert nervously hysterical cackle)

You folks have LOTS of togetherness ahead. We all do.  But it looks like Rose may have a little more togetherness ahead than some of us.

Experiencing lower back pain upon waking?

Okay, come on. It’s adorable!

If only all summer moments could be this peaceful. Stay strong, parents…

 

Guest Nappers #92 and #93: Dreaming While Delayed

21 May

Memorial Day is almost here. Are you gearing up for a delightfully relaxing family vacation?

(insert evil laugh)

Amanda sent me these pics of her kids asleep in the most comfortable and hygienic of places, all thanks to family travel.

Likes a firm pillow.

I especially like how this one seems to be praying for the imminent end to this vacation.

Now I lay me down to sleep…

Now I sit me down to wait

I fear I’ll never leave this gate

If this plane more delayed shall be

I pray you all should pity me

Um…over and out.

Nearly the unofficial start of summer travel, folks! Stock up on the juice boxes and the DVDs…

Guest Napper #90 – Flexible Flop

30 Apr

You know when you wake up and you just feel like you slept at a strange angle?

Ow.

Or perhaps that you were trying to do a “bboy” style shoulder spin in your sleep? Nah, me neither.

Bethany saw her daughter sleeping like this and had to decide if she should wake her or let her lie. Guided by the predominant parental wisdom never to wake a sleeping baby, she risked the neck crick.

Apparently, the child woke fresh as a daisy.

Doubters – 0. Sleep Lovers – 1.

May your Monday be free of muscle relaxants. If…that’s what you want.

Guest Napper #89 – Snoozin’ and Skatin’

23 Apr

…and sun.

We haven’t had any sun for a few days, so this picture from Susan (a.k.a. Wubboo Mummy) looked so inviting. I mean, I also enjoy sleeping on a skateboard from time to time.

 

Is she levitating?

Apparently, Susan was busy kicking a ball nearby with her son, when she turned to find that Briannah had eschewed their tedious sport and decided to spend her time more wisely.

I’m with Briannah.

I mean, soccer can only be played up to a certain age, but sleeping is a sport for life.

This could be a new sport, in fact.

She does look like she was thinking about throwing that ball when she was overcome by drowsiness. Perhaps she’ll toss it when she awakens. Next up: halfpipe while blindfolded.

But we’ll need to have Susan sign a release form for that one. Happy Monday!

 

Guest Napper #87 – Maxed Out

17 Apr

You know, on reflection, this is a new one. We’ve had naps under the table. Next to the table.  On the counter. But we’re not quite done…

Likes a really, really firm bed.

Luckily, there are still a few napping locations left on the table for us.

Tee hee.

Apparently Becky left Max to finish up his dinner and when she returned, moments later, he was like this. I guess finishing those veggies is an activity we’ll have to table for later.

OKAY, I’m stopping.

Happy Tuesday to all. May your meals be wakeful.

Guest Napper #86 – Dreams with Daddy

13 Apr

No hijinks this Friday – just a sweet little nap for all the kids whose parents are serving far away.

Nap Buddy

Thanks to Vanessa and Zach for this reminder that the best dreams are of the ones you love.

Guest Napper #81 – Rainy Day Rest

4 Apr

Kathy has given me the perfect guest napper for a slightly damp spring day!

It is, after all, that season when you’re neither here nor there. Neither hot nor cold. Neither dry nor wet. Neither barefoot nor panted.

Wait. Neither barefoot nor panted? 

Ready for any weather. As long as it's not too cold.

Joey, here, was so excited about his little wellies that he couldn’t be parted from them…neither from the wellies nor from his nap, apparently. He’s a full-on Christopher Robin, just waiting to conquer the Hundred Acre Wood.

In his dreams, anyway.

He looks very serious about it.

Is that Pooh’s honey pot to Joey’s right? Oh, I do hope so. I am rather grumbly in my tummy.

Oh bother. Somebody’s been napping…

Perhaps, when he wakes, Kanga and Roo can convince Joey he should become one with the panted people. For now, the boots will have to do.

 

Guest Napper #80 – Super Snoozer

3 Apr

I love a man in uniform.

Who better to save me from the tedium of this interminable Spring Break than the man with the BIG S on his chest?

Nap time is my kryptonite.

He’s dreamy, isn’t he? His Mom swears his name is Cole, but he looks like a Clark to me. Look at him – all unassuming – as he watches over his plastic playdom.

Naptropolis

Rest easy, citizens of the world. The sleepy city is in good hands.

Guest Napper #79 – Scintillating Spring Break

2 Apr

I know this isn’t true for everyone, but today is the first day of what promises to be a very loooooong Spring Break for me.

Mind you, there was a time when Spring Break meant flirting with cute guys and cruising in borrowed convertibles. I wore a few outfits that scandalized my mother. I may have even taken a few naps…after being up until late at night annoying the regular residents of Palm Springs along with my thousands of spring breaking pals. I think we broke their spring, for sure. Anyhoo…

This picture from Dainelle, however, shows more accurately what I have to look forward to this week. I would say “let’s take the kids to an art museum” but Devon isn’t finding art very stimulating. Her drawing does appear to be soothing, however.

Sometimes art is boring.

I have to say that if Devon (a girl) is finding this coloring boring, you can bet the boys will last about 60 seconds at this activity, after which they will go out into the backyard and spend the next hour covering themselves in potting soil.

I so look forward to cleaning that up.

Devon looks like the coloring wore her out, though.

I'm just closing my eyes for a second, Mom.

Yep. I am looking forward to this week. Mmmhhhmmmm.

Yes, indeedy.

 

Guest Napper #78 – Facedown Friday

30 Mar

I’d be shocked if there’s a parent out there who can’t relate to this image on a Friday. Heck, I’d be surprised if any adult out there doesn’t feel like this by the end of today. In fact, I feel like this now, having been awakened at 6am to do some surprise tick removal on one of my boys. All this outdoor spring play not only causes exhaustion (see below) but it also causes infestation, apparently.

Um. Ew. (Please send Deep Woods Off)

Anyway, Oliver, here, is demonstrating the kid craziness that can happen when spring has sprung.

Flop.

Ironically, he won’t be doing much springing for the next hour or two.

I see some crumbs...a lego...your engagement ring...

Unless, that is, he’s really awake and spelunking for a half-eaten graham cracker. I could understand that. Playing outside can make a guy hungry!

Elmo likes graham crackers!

Happy Friday, good friends! May your weather be fine and your naps be lengthy. Over and OUT.

Guest Napper #77 – All Cooped Up

27 Mar

What the heck, Mother Nature? Just when we had come to terms with having, like, NO WINTER, and gotten the water table out and planted the basil…well…this is basically unacceptable.

Paige shared this photo of her son and her husband. I’m not sure what her husband thinks about being banished indoors back to the couch, but her son seems to be, like, TOTALLY OVER IT.

So over the cold weather.

You might say this guy is down on his knees, begging the warm weather please to come home. 


Okay, well he’s on someone’s knees, anyway.

Wake me when the temperatures get back into the sixties, m’kay?

 

Guest Napper #76 – PiZZZa Party

23 Mar

As parents, we are appalled by what has happened to our Friday nights.

Sure, we’re glad it’s the weekend, finally. However, any mom or dad will tell you it can sometimes be lights out by 9:30pm, even for the adults. For others, perhaps, a little earlier than that…

Friday nights are hard.

Esther’s daughter didn’t make it through dinner.

The worst part is, I know if this were my kid, I’d actually be tempted to eat the rest of that pizza. You know, like the toast bones of the grilled cheese.

Yummy.

May you party like rock stars tonight, friends.

Guest Napper #75 – Sunny Snoozin’

21 Mar

I’m a tad bit afraid that Mel‘s little girl is having dreams about global warming,  because this is some seriously nutty weather we’re getting. Unlike William, who likes to spend these days napping under the grill cover, this lazy lass has managed to plant herself in a place of proper appreciation of (and protection from) the sun.

That "75" is for 75 degrees, fool.

My advice is, soak up the sun now, because we could just as well be getting snowstorms in June this year.

Mother Nature has gone rogue.

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Guest Napper #74 – Undercovers

16 Mar

We all like to have sweet dreams, but Noah has taken extra precautions to ensure that his are especially amusing.

Knock knock...

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Noah.

Noah who?

You didn’t Noah it was me taking that nap, did you?

Ahhhh, I amuse myself. Really, I do. I’ll be here all week.

But, seriously, folks. Because sleep is serious issue. Can we give this little guy a 10 for his excellent performance?

Happy Friday to all!


Guest Napper #73 – Wimpy Workout

12 Mar

We parents know that sometimes you have to use whatever you have on hand to keep those kids exercising. Sometimes, however, the pull of the couch is just too soporific to inspire an active lifestyle. As a scientist of sleep, I am wondering if it is the couch, itself, that induces these snoozes…or is it just the arm of the couch?

Forward Roll #FAIL

I would say this is going to become the newest home workout craze, but it doesn’t appear to be a very good calorie burner, does it?

Christopher looks, at least, like he’s going to feel refreshed after this workout. He is exercising his right to relax.

Let’s show him our support.

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Guest Napper #72 – Box and Bottle

8 Mar

Abby sent me this picture of Zoey, and there’s so much going on here that I don’t know what to highlight.

Basically, this little girl crashed out in a box, with her blankie on her head, while drinking a bottle. No, really, take a look.

There's a Seuss book in here somewhere...

I have to say, she might have been better served saving this awesome material for college.

I especially like the detail of her sister in the background, ready to do a bedtime cheer of some sort. I mean, a girl deserves accolades for hitting her nap this hard.

N-A-P-P

That’s the way we wanna be!

Go Naps…go Go GO NAPS!

Yeah yeah yeah!

Oh, come on. This nap deserves an extra “P” and you know it.

Guest Napper #71 – Tired of Toothpaste

5 Mar

Goodness knows, we all try to teach our kids good hygiene. You know…wash your HANDS and brush your TEETH. It seems like a constant uphill battle to get them to perform these tasks at all, let alone correctly.

Well, Odin seems to have a little extra work to do. You see, he has slathered his hands with toothpaste. I can well imagine he got exhausted before he was able to get this mess off his fingers. Apparently, he had to take a break.

Sticky Fingers

I can tell you who won’t be getting a break: his parents. They have some serious wet vac work to do here.

On the upside, if he eats any Cheerios off the floor later, he’ll be getting extra flouride.

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Guest Napper #69 – Sleepy Surfing

27 Feb

At first, when I saw this picture Emma sent of her son Sirius, I thought “Eh, he’s sleeping on an ottoman. We’ve seen that before.”

But he’s not. Look more closely.

Surfing the microsuede...

In fact, Sirius is balanced on the arm of this couch. He looks like he conked out there on the way to his workout, but this shouldn’t be a problem. I’m quite sure his abs are getting toned as he sleeps.

How does one drift off peacefully, while balancing on the arm of a couch? I’m not sure (as I have never done it) but I’ve spotted a familiar culprit, lying facedown on the seat to his left.

Grilled cheese. Buzz Lightyear. The list of clues grows in the quest to find the perfect sleep-inducing environment.

Peace out, little surf dude. Peace out.

 

Guest Napper #68 – sNappy Dresser

21 Feb

First and foremost, a disclaimer that no diapered children were harmed during the making of this post…so keep your pants on.

Sue tells me that her son Logan is just a climbing fool, and one day she came into his room around nap time to find him like this:

Thinking ahead?

I mean, most of us have to battle our kids to keep them on the changing table. Logan is clearly far more enlightened than the average toddler.  He knows that he’s going to need dry pants sometime soon. Why not start the process before the nap?

Of course, Sue removed him from the changing table for his own safety, but she tells me the next day he was back up there again. She even resorted to covering the changing table with stuffed animals to deter him…but Logan is a man who knows his own mind and likes a dry pant, apparently.

sNappy dresser...

Something tells me Sue is going to have to “table” those plans for her kid to always nap in his crib. (ba dum DUM!)

Guest Napper #67 – Flying Friendly-like

17 Feb

With my good friend Allison at Motherhood WTF preparing to take an epic flight to New Zealand, I found this picture of wee future traveler Adora to be particularly apt.

Adora’s mom, Ruth, tells me this girl was sitting in her Bumbo waiting for a meal, and I’ll be damned if I haven’t had this experience on an overstuffed jet crossing the Atlantic many a time.

Only I never recline my seat all the way, people.

Quick nap before meal service

I think Ruth is going to have to explain to Adora that only huge men with stinky feet recline their seats all the way when meal service is ramping up. How the heck is a person to eat her custard with some guy’s greasy head pushing it into her lap?

In the meantime, I guess we should still take a moment to appreciate Adora’s flexibility. She will no doubt make a superb globetrotter. Once she gets out of this infernal Bumbo.

Keep the skies friendly for Allison, friends. Recline halfway. Over and out.

Guest Napper #66 – Upholstered Exhaustion

16 Feb

These pictures Jen sent me of her daughter Cecelia remind me of how I feel at 10pm on some weekdays.

In short, I’m just done.

I'm just done, people.

I can neither confirm nor deny that Cecelia has been teaching class, but she sure looks like she knows my pain. Perhaps she had a bad day getting those unruly teddy bears to attend to their alphabet.

It's just so demoralizing.

Did she fall asleep beating her fists on the chair? Railing against the human condition, wherein one must labor uphill every day and never make progress?

Dunno, but she’s out cold now.

Sweet dreams, girlfriend. May you find respite from the rat race.

Guest Napper #65 – Ow ow ow ow!

13 Feb

Folks, I’m about to make you feel really old. At very least, I’m about to drive a huge spike in memberships at yoga studios for the week.

Ow ow ow ow ow!

Nilam sent me this picture of her daughter Karina.

Now you go do it.

Guest Napper #64 – Mortified Mope?

10 Feb

 

Falling asleep in your bouncer isn’t a new idea. We’ve seen it before around here. Something different is going on, though, in this picture that Crystal sent me.

It’s like Jack is saying, “Mom. Please. I am TOO OLD FOR THIS STUFF.”

This is just too humiliating.

Monkeys? Rainbows? I mean…what a snooze.

Cheer up, Jack. It’s Friday.

 

Guest Napper #63 – Touchdown! I mean…Facedown!

7 Feb

My husband is a huge Patriots fan and is clearly outnumbered in his office. Seeing as how he’s in enemy territory, this is how I envision him this week at work.

Under his desk.

It's safe here.

I don’t know if little Alex has any particular team sympathies, but I do note that he is prepared to stay down there next to his chair for as long as it takes. He’s brought water.

I’m not sure what that is under his cheek, but it seems like he brought his own washcloth, too. I mean, clean skin is a priority, people. I read in a magazine, years ago, that you are NEVER too tired to wash your face before bed.

Especially if your cheek will be making contact with someone else’s seat.

 

 

Guest Napper #62 – Pillow Top Pooch

31 Jan

Most parents are distressed when napping goes to the dogs at their houses. Maria (mother of both of these two snoozers), however, doesn’t have a problem with it.

Too much closeness?

We’ve all heard about “a boy and his dog.” But what about us girls? As you can see, Duke is pretty patient with his girl Isabel…and it looks like his patience may need to last for awhile.

Whimper.